Coffee related merchandise

[oscar95]

What is it with you girls and your themed presents?
A guy has to only say hes interested in, for instance, golf
and every fathers day ,birthday, christmas come the relentless golf themed presents. Like, I must have all the Greg Norman merchandise.....hat,T-shirt, umbrella,key-ring,thermal mug etc etc etc. Imagine how you would feel when asked to play through, and, wearing all the G.N. gear (yes, including THAT hat the one with the shark on top!) and you duff your drive.
Now, having indicated an interest in coffee, I must have just about all of the Di Bella merchandise.....hat, T-shirt, umbrella, key-ring, thermal mug etc etc etc. (they probably use Greg Normans merchandising consultant). And of course, when the daughters visit you and you are going out for a coffee you have to wear the presents.So off we go and here I am all in black looking like a barista (I draw the line at wearing the apron however!)
Now I think of it , WHO is that smart Alec at the cafe, who on leaving, always comes over to my table to thank me for the nice coffee he has just had?
But lately, things are looking up with extra colours being added to the clothing lines. Even my wife admits that I cut a rather dashing figure at the local espresso bar on a Saturday morning with my brown coffeecentral T-shirt and contrasting beige hat with logo. Though this Saturday morning, I came face to face with a guy wearing exactly the same outfit.
"Daughters" he said, shaking his head.
"Daughters" I replied, nodding my agreement.

[flynnaus]

Re: Coffee related merchandise

Coffee related merchandise
Today at 09:18 What is it with you girls and your themed presents?
A guy has to only say hes interested in, for instance, golf
and every fathers day ,birthday, christmas come the relentless golf themed presents. Like, I must have all the Greg Norman merchandise.

Could you be the man who has everything CJM and they are stuck for ideas of what to buy you? Or is that your socks and undies draw chocablock, necessitating the need for a change of tack on what to buy Dad.

Tactfully trying not to point the sexism finger, do you have a son and, if so, does he buy more Ill-bet-Dad-will-appreciate-this) presents (scotch, kopi luwak, Maserati)?

You need to leave hints close to Christmas, Fathers Day or birthday times such as magazines left open to a picture of a desired item

[oscar95]

Re: Coffee related merchandise

Hi flynn, ran the yarn past the wife and daughters and they forgave me but I have to wear the apron out tomorrow......guess whos going to Coffee Sisters at Broadbeach?

[Pavoniboy]

Re: Coffee related merchandise

Originally, I let on hints that I love coffee making for potential gift buyers. I then found out that everyone buys you some packet of preground coffee (for lack of a better word) that comes in a fancy packet and cant be bought at their local supermarket, so they think it must be good (and probably paid a fortune for it).

So then I had to try to tactfully work into conversations (months after receiving said gift, not straight away) how all preground packet coffee is complete crap...no matter how good the marketing may be and how special it may look on the shelf. Also use stories of how all coffee sitting on the shelf in some shop (that is not a roaster or specialty coffee house) is always months old, but coffee only lasts weeks, minutes if ground and on and on with stories containing hints to please dont waste you money on crap I will end up throwing in the bin.

I actually hope for coffee making accessories (a good knock box if any readers are thinking of buying me a gift ;D), NOT coffee itself, unless of course my family and friends want to sign up to CS in which case I will take any green bean on offer, thank you, or visit a roaster and buy some whole beans with a roast date on them.

[Koffee_Kosmo]

Re: Coffee related merchandise

Dont mention Kopi Luwak
You dont want to be wearing Kopi Droppings on you T Shirt chest ;D

KK

[flynnaus]

Re: Coffee related merchandise

ran the yarn past the wife and daughters

Courageous move, CJM. I hope it has the desired effect but I would have advocated for the more subtle hint.

I have to wear the apron out tomorrow......guess whos going to Coffee Sisters at Broadbeach?  

Thats some penance to pay. Perhaps you had better prepare yourself by reading the "Barista venting thread" because you may be accosted with similar inquiries.

Hang on...it isnt ONLY the apron is it? My niece bought her a father (my bro) an apron from Florence that features the the torso of Michelangelos David (without figleaf). It made an improvement on his normal physique but he had to be discouraged from providing the full Monty experience for those watching hom tend the BBQ - and not just out of OH&S considerations!

[Lovey]

Re: Coffee related merchandise

On a slightly philosophical note, the glass seems to be half full.
You should be thankful that you have such a wonderful family that cares enough about you to buy you gifts that they think youll like.
I dropped a hint that I liked gold, obviously they mis-heard me and thought I said golf, so my supply of golf balls is ever increasing by the year ;D.

[Bullitt]

Re: Coffee related merchandise

On another slightly philosophical note,
what kind of presents are you buying them?
Us blokes arent always the best at buying presents that the ladies really like...
Maybe there is a hint in there about how to buy something for them that they like..just a thought

[oscar95]

Re: Coffee related merchandise

You know, one of my favourite Seinfeld episodes is the one where Kramer, all too quickly, chooses the infinite cups of coffee as compensation, then hurries to the nearest coffee outlet and.........much, much later, lurches out into the street and begins to hyper-walk his way home.
That scene is truly one of coffees iconic comic moments!
Now Im not one to gloat but Ive got the ultimate coffee T-shirt. Its black, and the bold lettering (in white) on the front proclaims ... The Ultimate Coffee Experience... and youd swear that in a certain light this lettering emits a sort of blue iridescence! On the back is the Di Bs logo with a coffee bean on a rectangular crema coloured background. Its years since I saw anybody wearing one so this must be the last survivor. Thats why its kept in a purpose built container in a semi-darkened room at a constant 21.5 degrees C. Its been my Coffee ticket to ride, worth its weight in Kopi Luwak.

Rewind to early 2007,mid-afternoon, Im downtown and wearing Ultimate. I spy a cafe which has Di Bs, and, looking in through the window notice a lull in business and a couple of baristas with nothing to do. Perfect. My finely tuned senses also note the particular blend of coffee here and its one I know the tasting notes off by heart. As I walk in the baristas spot Ultimate and show respect. Next Im reciting the tasting notes, so now Ive got their attention. Soon, despite my protestations of barista judging ignorance, they are not listening, just pulling shots and saying "Try this!" "No, youll agree this is superior" etc etc. Somebody arrives from out the back claiming hes top- gun barista around here and begins to prepare a latte for me.....later, much later, I lurch out into the street and begin to hyper-walk my way home.....what was I thinking?

[Thundergod]

Re: Coffee related merchandise

what was I thinking?

;D
Classic!

[Ronin]

Re: Coffee related merchandise

Just think of all those people at Di Bs you are keeping employed in this financially uncertian time.......................

[au_d2]

Re: Coffee related merchandise

I lurch out into the street and begin to hyper-walk my way home.....what was I thinking?

Lol .. were you like the Dancing Guy here http://coffeesnobs.com.au/YaBB.pl?num=1245035551 ..

Hes had a little bit too much of something

[oscar95]

Re: Coffee related merchandise

What is it with coffee books and their authors? Now I dont know about you but Ive never been able to finish a single one. No kidding, Ive got sixteen coffee books plus several mags lined up on my bookshelf, all with bookmarks...none finished. Maybe there is some conspiracy by coffee book authors....write them like that occasional coffee you have....great start but later on sort of dies in the cup. This way there is no leakage to other readers i.e. coffee books arent handed on to friends because you never finish them so we all have to buy our own hence greater sales. My aim when I retire is to finish reading some of these. No, damn it, Ill finish one right now!
Eenie-Meenie-Miney-Mo God in a Cup struth, try again
Eenie-Meenie-Miney-Mo Roasted Passion, surely I can finish this.....now where was I?...page 176..."challenge is to understand the big picture and leverage it where appropriate...strategies should be initiated to leverage the trends. The tyranny of hypergrowth raises the stakes............................................ .."challenge is to understand the big picture and leverage it where".............phew!, Ill never finish this. Even Pat (Askthecoffeeguy) will finish Foxy brown before I finish a single one of these!
Its frustrating. Maybe I need a book with a lot less pages. What about this new one then; Airport Coffee Hotspots?
Now theres one even I can finish!

[GregJW]

Re: Coffee related merchandise

;D

Im glad Im not the only one with half read coffee books in the bookshelf. I did finish Espresso Quest and Black Gold - both excellent - but some others are a great cure for insomnia.

[A_M]

Re: Coffee related merchandise

;D

Im glad Im not the only one with half read coffee books in the bookshelf. I did finish Espresso Quest and Black Gold - both excellent - but some others are a great cure for insomnia.

I have a number... Some given some purchased... Not all have been read..

I did buy The Home Coffee Machine Review - Book... Just to get a FC donation in and must say while some of the articles were good... I had an issue with teh so called warm up times that were being quoted...

I think the longest was about 8 to 12 minutes... Off the top of my head... Must admit it did wake me up for a moment or two before I slipped back in the Coffee dreams...