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Maxim CR120 electric grinder review (parody)

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  • Maxim CR120 electric grinder review (parody)

    Grab a coffee and get ready for the Maxim CR120 Burr Mill Grinder Review.

    Everyone tells me that the only way to truly appreciate coffee is to have it freshly ground. I've dabbled with one of those blade grinders but they are a pain to clean. Whilst shoving a knife in the manual over-ride slot and leaving the lid off helped reduce the cleaning and improved the aroma (coffee was literally hanging in the air), the amount of beans required per cup was approaching 200 grams. Not ideal.

    When I saw this on the internet I jumped at it...and immediately searched further for a cheaper outlet with possible free shipping. I managed to get it as low as $31 into my anticipant hands.

    Firstly this unit is made entirely of plastic and matches my Ikea kitchen perfectly. It even has rubber feet so it doesn't ruin the contact adhesive I use on the bench. The clear plastic has a slight colour tinge to it that when combines with the natural optical distortion that plastic provides, gives the beans a great sickly mutated look. No need to buy those exotic looking foreign beans everyone raves about for this baby.

    The plug also matches the body of the machine with its austere black European sensibilities. Very classy.

    Looking further into the inside stuff I'm disappointed to find the actual grinder mechanism isn't also plastic. This is concerning as everyone knows good machine maintenance means regular cleaning but its likely to rust after its 1st wash. Perhaps thats intended as it'll add an interesting metalic tang to my coffee.

    In use its quite noisy and somewhat reminisent of my hotted up Holden Gemini when it had a hole in the exhaust. It sounded so phat like a WRX that I drove it like that till the muffler fell off.

    So it sounds awsome but the real question is how does it taste? Not great is the 1st thought followed by cats pee in mud as a close 2nd.

    I tried flicking the setting knob wildly and shaking the thing like crazy but still couldnt get a result anywhere near a nescafe blend43 or International Roast. The coffee just wont dissolve. Someone on here had suggested try different beans. I've tried several including canali and baked with somewaht interesting results. I'll have to update the review as soon as the rust starts forming.

    The cofey can easily be improved by using a double shot of JD's whiskey per cup. This is my 4th cup while typing this up this morning and it tastes f'n great now!!

    If you do decide to persist then just use the big setting with the grinds the size of bull-ants. You'll find it far easier to clean up and it adds more texturez. It'll also impress your mates and moles better coz they can see the real coffee n'stuff. Some grains crawled away too.

    Overall I rate this machine 59 NesCafe pods and a dirty thong on the Coffee Bogans scale.

    In the mean time my scrag wants her thong back so she can put her pants back on and go to the pub. Catch you for the next review.