In recent days you may have read that the 2006 Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest results have been announced. The contest calls for truly bad sentences of original literary fiction.
The winning and 2nd-place entries have received much press. Less well publicised is Dennis Barrys winning entry under the "Romance" category:
"Despite the vast differences it their ages, ethnicity, and religious upbringing, the sexual chemistry between Roberto and Heather was the most amazing he had ever experienced; and for the entirety of the Labor Day weekend they had sex like monkeys on espresso, not those monkeys in the zoo that fling their feces at you, but more like the monkeys in the wild that have those giant red butts, and access to an espresso machine."
More about the Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest, and complete 2006 results can be found here: